Jenifer

AKA, "Butterface"

Steven Weber (Wings, etc.) stars as Detective Frank Spivey, a family man who rescues a young woman named Jenifer from being killed in the woods by what seems to be a deranged man.  Then Frank finds himself drawn to her - I'll go out on a limb and say that this is because she has a really hot body and is continually trying to have sex with him - despite the obvious drawbacks of the situation, which, in no specific order, are that she is mentally retarded, she is a cannibal, he's MARRIED, and she's so ridiculously deformed we wouldn't be having this conversation if everything besides her face weren't hot.

But her face, y'all.

And she eats people.

This movie was released under the "Masters of Horror" label, and was made by Dario Argento.  I'm not sure if I've ever heard of this guy besides the fact that I've known I've had this movie in my queue for the past 3 years - but I would not call this movie a masterpiece of horror.  At best, it's soft porn.  Well, not at best.  If you're hoping for porn, you won't get it.  But if you're hoping for horror, it's going to feel more like porn.

Don't watch it.  And definitely don't spend three years waiting for it to rise to the top of the queue.  This woman's face.

Availability: DVD only
Released: 2006
Added to queue: 6/10/2010
Reason added to queue: Some magazine article or something.